Fighting for reality or is it?
by Winter's Rose
Summary: Everything in Suze's life is going good. Except for Paul. When Suze doesn't go out with Paul he gets really mad, and threatens to take everything she loves away from her. Theres only one person who can save her. Who will it be?
1. Default Chapter

Fighting for reality...or is it?  
  
Chapter 1 'Why Me'  
  
I woke up this morning with sleepy yelling at me to hurry up and get ready or he's leaving without me. And he would to, I was sure if it. So I climbed out of bed and got in the shower when I came out Jesse was sitting on the day bed with Spike. It surprised me that he was here at all. Every since we got back from the shadowland and he kissed me he hadn't been around much. Then Paul Slater comes back and Jesse beat the crap out of him. Then we kissed AGAIN in the cemetery, and you'd think everything would be fine now. Oh no. Not for me. Not for the mediator. NO! Jesse had to move tot he rectory and I hardly ever see him. So I'm starting to wonder why he even kissed me in the first place. God! My life sucks. I was getting my books ready and walking to the door when Jesse got up, walked over to and put a hand on my shoulder.  
  
"Querida are you mad at me?'' he said with a very hot sad look on his face.  
  
I was mad at him. I mean he avoids me after he kissed me not once but twice. But looking at his face and hearing him calling me querida, I couldn't be mad at him.  
  
"No I'm not mad at you. Why would I be?"  
  
"I thought...well never mind. You had better get down stairs before Jake leaves you." Was all he said before disappearing.  
  
I stood there in a daze. What was going on in Jesse's mind? I was snapped out of it when Doc came in threw the doorway.  
  
"Suze come on were leaving."  
  
I headed down stairs and made it to the jeep just as they were getting ready to pull out. Needless to say we got to school late. But nobody noticed. Except him, Paul Slater. He was standing by my homeroom. I tried to walk past him, but he grabbed my arm and pulled me to the nearest closet.  
  
"Would you let go of my arm? God that hurts you know." was all I could say before he kissed me. That when I kneed him in the crotch. He gasped on pain and fell backwards on the floor.  
  
"You stupid bitch. You'll pay for that. I'll make sure of it." he said before I punched him in the face.  
  
"Noone calls me a bitch and gets away with it. Make all the threats you want Paul, but know that if you come near me again I will kick your ass." I started to walk out of the closet when Paul grabbed my arm and pulled me back in.  
  
"I'm not threw with you yet. I said we would be together and we WILL."  
  
"I said let go of me." I said trying to fight him off me, but he was too strong.   
  
That when he slapped me across the face. Hard. He split my lip and blood was running down my chin. When I noticed that I got really mad I mean now I was going to look like some freak with a face the size of a watermelon. So that when I just hit him as hard as I could in the face and I know I broke his nose because you could hear it brake. I felt proud I haven't broken anyone's nose in a while. With that I got up and left. I went straight home where I knew nobody would be to try and fix my face.  
  
When I got home I went up to my room and went straight for the mirror. It really looked bad I mean it was bruised and everything. I would have to wear at look of makeup to cover this up. My mom would total flip when she found out that I was in another fight. I mean with Jesse and Paul fighting and me in it. Let me tell you after that she was mad. So getting a fat lip would not be good for me. So on with the makeup. As I was putting it on I noticed a faint glow in the corner.  
  
"Nombre de Dios, querida what did you do to yourself?" Jesse said with a look of concern. I thought I would melt right then.  
  
"Hey Jesse. Nice to see you to." I said hoping he noticed the sarcasm in that.  
  
"This is no time to be smart Susannah. What happen to you?"  
  
"Well do you want the long version or the short?" I asked grinning at him with my busted lip.  
  
"Susannah."   
  
"Ok fine. I got to school and Paul was there waiting for me. He pulled me inside a closet and kissed." when I said that the scar above Jesse eye stated glowing and I stepped back a step and continued. "I kneed him and then he said that we would be together and I tried to fight him off and thats when he slapped me and I broke his nose and ran."  
  
By that time Jesse had that look on his face. The one he get when he wants to kill someone. Which most of the time is Paul.  
  
"I'm going to kill him. Nobody hurts my querida and gets away with it."  
  
"Jesse please don't go doing anything to get yourself exorcised. I can handle Paul I mean if he hadn't have a hold of my arm I would have beaten the living daylights out of him. This is nothing I mean its looks worse then it feels. It just hurts a little bit and tomorrow my head will look like a watermelon, but really its fine."  
  
"Susannah I will not go after Paul if you don't want me to. Now come here." he said pulling me to the bathroom. Once we got in there he got a wash cloth and wetted it and cleaned my cut. It was really sweet of him. But it hurt like hell.  
  
"Ow God Jesse that hurts."  
  
"Sorry querida, but it needs to be cleaned or it will get infected."  
  
"Thank you Jesse. For Everything."  
  
"Your welcome querida."  
  
Then he kissed me on the forehead. Its not the lips but hey it works. My lips was to busted to kiss anyway. After that we talked about Paul some more and decided that he wasn't worth beating the crap out of. 


	2. The Doctors

Chapter 2 'The Doctor'  
  
I woke up the next day my face looked horrible. My lip was really big, it was completely ugly. I was in the shower when it started, I got really dizzy and lightheaded. I just thought I was coming down with something. So I went about my morning fixing my hair and picking out something to wear. By that time Jesse was already setting on the daybed reading some other book he found in my room. I was walking to the door when all of a sudden I got really dizzy and had to grab on the door to keep from falling.  
  
"Querida, are you alright?" Jesse said getting up and walking over to me and putting his hand on my shoulder.  
  
"Yeah, I'm alright just a little dizzy is all."  
  
"Are you sure."  
  
"Yeah I'm fine." That's all I remember, because I fainted. Yeah you heard right fainted. When I woke up that's when everything started to go to hell.  
  
I woke up in a white room. I thought I was in the hospital, but I wasn't. I was in a room that had nothing in it. There was at least five doctors walking around my room. Thats when I got scared.  
  
"Where's my mom? Where's Andy?" A doctor came over and sat beside me.  
  
"Ms. Simon's can you hear me?"  
  
"What's going on? Where's my mom and Andy?"  
  
"Susannah calm down."  
  
Then everything went black again. When I open my eyes again. I was in my room and everyone was around my bed.   
  
"What's going on?" I said   
  
"Honey you fainted. We found you on the floor. We called the doctor they should be here in a minute." My mom said.  
  
About five minutes later the doctor came in a checked me out. He couldn't find anything wrong with me. He said that I must have been over heated or something like that. And when I fell I must have split my lip on a dresser. Yeah right! Everyone left but my mom.   
  
"Suzie are you sure your alright?"  
  
"Yeah mom I'm fine really."  
  
"Ok. I'm going to go now. You better get some sleep you look a little pale."  
  
"Bye mom"  
  
She shut the door and left when I closed my eyes thats when I felt Jesse appear. I just laid there with my eye closed for a little while. I mean I just have this freaky experience that I have no idea where I was. I was a little tired.  
  
"Susannah are you alright. When you fainted I went and got David to came in here to help you."  
  
"You went and got David again?"  
  
"I tried to wake you up but you wouldn't so I went in his room and told him you needed help in your room."  
  
"Thanks. But it was really weird when I fainted I woke up in this room there was nothing in it and everything was really white. There was at least five doctors just walking around staring at me. I asked where I was but everything went black and I was back here in my bed. I was really weird."  
  
"You were in a white room with a lot of doctors? Susannah I think you should talked to Father Dominic about this. I think theres more to this then it seems."  
  
"I will, but later. Right now I just need to sleep." I said getting cozy in my bed. Then I noticed that Jesse came and sat down beside me on the bed. He ran his hand threw my hair.  
  
"Sleep well querida." Then he disappeared.  
  
"Goodnight Jesse."  
  
tbc 


	3. Maybe Its Not Real

Chapter 3  
  
I was in Father Dom's office the next morning taking Jesse's advice and telling him everything that happened the day before.   
  
"So you started feeling dizzy and then fainted? Then you wake up in a white room with doctors standing around you? I've never heard of anything like that before. What did you do yesterday that was different then what you normally do?"  
  
"Nothing. I just got up and feel down."  
  
"Where'd you get that split lip?"  
  
"Um well. Paul and I kind of had a little fight at school the day before yesterday. You know him saying that we will be together and all that crap. Then he hit me and I think I broke his nose."  
  
"Susannah violence is not the way we handle things and you know that."  
  
"Father Dom. you should have heard all the things he was saying. 'You will pay for this.' and stuff like that. I had to punch him.  
  
"He said you will pay. Maybe he has something to do with what is happening to you. I think you should stay as far away from him as you can. While I research whats happening to you. You should go to class now."  
  
"Okay, see you later."  
  
I was walking down the hall going to class. When Paul stepped out in front of me. Let me tell you if his nose was broken it didn't look anything like it. It looked like it had before I punched him.  
  
"Suze did you like my little present that you got yesterday?"  
  
"You did that? You made me faint and have this weird ass dream thing?"  
  
"It wasn't a dream Suze that was really happening, just not on the plane. You'll be getting more of them." he said then walked off. I was left wondering what else he was going to do with me. Right then I starting feeling dizzy but brushed it off and starting walking to my class.  
  
After school I got a ride home from Sleepy. When we got home I ran to my room and climbed in bed. The dizziness was getting worse I thought I was going to throw up. I just wanted to try to sleep it off. After a while I fell asleep. When I woke up I was in the same white room. I looked around but saw no one, I was alone. I got up and walked around looking for a door. There was a big metal door but it was locked from the outside. I pounded on it till someone came and opened it.  
  
"Ms. Simon do you want me to get a doctor?" the nurse asked.  
  
"I want someone to explain to me what is going on."  
  
"Hold on I'll go get the doctor." she said before she locked the door and left.  
  
I waited a couple of minutes for the doctor to come. When he finally came in to the room I could see that it was the same doctor from my other vision or dream or whatever this was.  
  
"Susannah I see that your awake. Now I can asked you some questions if you will just give me the honest answer then you can have some visitors later, ok?"  
  
I really didn't know what to do but play along with this so I said yes. He asked me some odd questions like if I knew my name and how long I've been in here and how old I was. Then he got to the questions that I thought was so stupid.  
  
"Now Susannah why do you think you can see and talk to ghosts? Its ok Susannah just give me the honest answer."  
  
"Because I can."  
  
"How many ghosts have you seen?"  
  
"Lots."  
  
"Why do you think that you can see and talk to ghosts. What part to you play with them?"  
  
"I help them to their next lives whatever that may be. They come to me and asked for help, so I help them."  
  
"How long have you been able to see ghosts?"  
  
"Um...as long as I can remember. I remember seeing my first ghost when I was little. It was standing at the top of the stairs and I told me mom about it, but she didn't believe me. I've seen a lot since then. My dad explained to me after he died that I was a Mediator."  
  
"Now Susannah we've talked about this you father is not dies. I don't know why you think he is, but his not. Hes outside right now with your mother. He just wants you to get better, as does your mother. We only want to help you get over this fantasy that you can see ghosts."  
  
"What fantasy I CAN see ghosts." I yelled at him. I was getting mad, him telling me that what I believed for over seventeen years was wrong. I don't think so.  
  
"Susannah just calm down, or I'll have to give you a something to knock you out."  
  
"Calm down. CALM DOWN! Your telling me that everything I know and believe is a lie, and you want me to CALM DOWN!"  
  
"Susannah you leave me no choose." Then he told a long needle and stuck it in my arm.   
  
Then he left me alone and walked outside. Through the window I could see him go over and talk to both my parents. They were talking I could hear what they were saying.  
  
"Mr. and Mrs. Simon Susannah isn't doing any better she still believes that she can see and talk to ghosts. We have a long talk about somethings she said that when she was little she first started see these 'ghosts' she said that she told you Mrs. Simon but you didn't believe her."  
  
"Yes I remember that. You mean shes had this illness since she was little. Oh God." she had to sit.  
  
"Mrs. Simons all Susannah has to do to get out of here is work with us. We have to show her that she is loved. She has said more then once that she is in love with a ghost named Jesse. I think that maybe she thinks shes not loved enough here that she makes up these ghosts and people so she can have what she believes is love. So if she improves and gets better she can go home."  
  
"Thank you doctor." both my parents said. Then the doctor left.  
  
I was getting drowsy and the last thing I remember was thinking 'Maybe their right maybe Jesse and Father Dominic isn't real. Maybe I'm just making it all up.' Then I fell asleep. 


	4. Everything

Chapter 4  
  
When I woke up I was in my own room in my own bed. For a minute I thought I was still in that metal hospital, but then Jesse was sitting on my bed so I knew I wasn't. I sat up in bed and he looked at me with those sexy brown eyes.  
  
"Susannah are you all right you were having a bad dream?" he said then everything about the hospital came back to me. I didn't know what to do. What if everything the doctor said was right what if I'm making all this up. No I couldn't be. Right? Right! I've been able to see ghosts for almost seventeen years now. I looked up at Jesse he was looking at me again.  
  
"Yeah Jesse everythings fine I just had a bed dream thats all." I knew I was lying to Jesse and hopefully he couldn't see through it. Thankfully he didn't.   
  
"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked in that sexy spanish voice of his.  
  
"I was in that room again. The one in the metal hospital. The doctor asked me some questions and then gave me a shot that would make me go to sleep then I woke up here. Thats all I remember."   
  
I lied to him again. I just didn't want him to make a big deal about it and say I should call Father Dom. about it.   
  
"Are you sure thats it? Nothing else happened?"  
  
"No, thats it."  
  
"I think I should tell Father Dominic about this. You should get some sleep." then he disappeared.   
  
I laid there thinking about everything that happened at the mental hospital. Both my parents were there. My dad was alive there. Thats what I've always wanted was for my dad to be alive and he was, only there. Then I thought about what the doctor had said about ghosts not being real. Jesse was real. I loved him. But that doctor said that I was just looking for love, but Jesse didn't love me. Then there was my stepbrothers and stepfather I know I seem like I don't like them, but really I do. They kind of grow on you after a while. Father Dominic was like a second dad. I have friends here Cee Cee and Adam. But there I had both parents. I thought about it for a while and all it did was give me a headache so I laid down and went back to sleep.  
  
When I woke up again I was in the same white room with doctors all around me. I still had the headache. The doctor's were talking really soft so that I couldn't here them. I watched them for a while and then one of them seen that I was awake.  
  
"Susannah we would like to talk to you for a moment. Is that alright?"  
  
"Um, yeah I guess."  
  
"Susannah everyone here wants you to get better and we thought that a walk with your family on the grounds might help you. You know getting out around people and seeing normal things might help you get better, faster. How does that sound?"  
  
"I guess its ok." was all I said. I keep thinking about everything thats happening. Then my mom and dad came in and we went out for a walk. Once we were outside I noticed that nothing looked like Carmel. There were tall building everywhere. It looked alot like New York.  
  
"We aren't in Carmel are we? Were in New York." I said mostly to myself.  
  
"Honey you always lived in New York, remember? You grow up here, with all your friends and school." mom told me. I just looked at her and keep walking. We walked a little bit more and then sat down on a bench.  
  
"Suze we have a surprise for you." my dad said. Then someone walks around the corner, I couldn't really tell who it was until she got closer. Gina!  
  
"Hey Suze how you feeling? You better be getting better so we can go out and party some time." she said and I just stared at her. Then it sank in and I rush at her and embraced her in a hug.  
  
"Gina I missed you so much. It gets so lonely where I'm at. You should come a visit me sometime." now it was her turn to stare at me.  
  
"Suze I visit you once a week, you know that." she said with a little laugh.  
  
"Oh yeah I remember now." so I lied a little. She was here know after all. We walk around some more and me and Gina talked for a while about her life while I was in the 'hospital'. She had a boyfriend named Grant. They've been dating for three months. It was like old times. Until I had to go back to that weird hospital. I said bye to Gina and we walked back.  
  
"Suzie you seemed to have a good time out today." my mom broke the silence.  
  
"Um yeah. Its nice talking to Gina again. I guess."  
  
"Honey all you have to do is admit to everyone and yourself that you cannot talk to ghosts and they'll let you go home. Thats all."  
  
"But.."  
  
"No buts about it just tell them that you don't talk to ghosts and everything we'll back to normal. Suze we really miss you at home. Things can be the way they were." my mom said with tears in her eyes. I felt so bad right then. "Just think about it."  
  
We went back to the hospital and I went back to my room. I sat on my bed and listening to the people passing my room and thinking about Gina and my parents and what they said. 


End file.
